The Devil to Pay
by LeahCK
Summary: Alex wanted her so she punished her. What happens when Olivia retaliates? Alex POV. First time story. A/O.
1. Chapter 1

I knew something was different as soon as she walked into my office. She looked desperate. I had never seen her so raw. It unsettled me in an unfamiliar way. The pulsing between my legs pronounced, but not unfamiliar.

Thinking back, I don't know when I became so fixated on her. Once it happened, it was like it had never not been happening. I fantasized about her every night. And I despised her for it. For making me want her.

I hated her for making me hate myself more than I already did.

So I punished her. I treated her like she was nothing. I took every opportunity to undermine her and expose her weaknesses, all under the guise of my job. It was cruel. Even Elliott noticed. He told me to lay off. As usual, I ignored him.

I'm the first to admit it was selfish and juvenile and unfair. It wasn't her fault, it was mine. But it didn't stop me. And the more I obsessed and the more I made myself come at night thinking about her, the more I made her pay each day.

But I never thought this would happen. If I had, I still don't know that it would have changed anything.

Now I feel emotions that are foreign to me and that make no sense in combination - pathetic, excited, angry, dirty, desperate, confused, elated... I could keep going. For someone who typically keeps her feelings in check, this was a fucking nightmare.

My eyes have lost focus and I can barely make out the words on my legal pad below. I had too many questions. How did she know? Did she even know? Does she know now?

And most of all, what the fuck just happened?

I've come undone.

I look at the door and my mind plays it back again and again, like a song on repeat and because it is my memory there is no fix.

"Don't ever talk to me like that in front of a suspect again. Ever." Her finger pointing at me.

"Don't come in here and tell me how to do my job." I walked around to the front of my desk to show her I wasn't scared.

"Like you don't tell me how to do mine?"

I pushed myself up on top of my desk and leaned backwards, legs crossed, my arms behind me holding me up and my head cocked to one side. I wanted desperately to cross my arms but if I did, she'd read me as being defensive. I wanted her to see how much I didn't care.

"It is how it works, Olivia. The way it is. I don't make the rules." I brushed a piece of lint off my skirt, another gesture meant to show my apathy.

"But you do. And because you're so self-righteous and delusional, you think you can get away with it."

"So now you are resorting to personal attacks?" I asked evenly.

I had been enjoying the conversation thus far in my own fucked up way. I couldn't be hurt if I didn't let myself feel it. And it all hurt less if I hurt first.

"You'll know when I personally attack you" she said somewhat menacingly.

She had been creeping into my space. Now she was leaning over me, her hands planted on the desk, just outside my thighs. She was forcing me to look at her.

"That sounds like a threat" I observed dispassionately, holding her gaze, tempting her.

"Enough, Alex."

Before I could move, before I could even breathe. Her hand on my knee. I couldn't react. I watched as she pushed up my dress aggressively. She spread my legs apart. I was in shock. This felt like a dream, it wasn't real.

She reached beneath the fabric and yanked my panties from my body. I think it hurt but I can't remember. If it did hurt, I didn't care.

She didn't even kiss me. Not that I expected that. Not that I expected any of this.

Her hands pushed my legs apart further and slid up my inner thighs. I cursed myself for trembling, not wanting to let her win.

I didn't even know she knew how to win. Or that a game was being played for that matter.

She dipped her head down and I had to stop myself from moaning, restrain myself from voicing the anticipation and desire that was nearly killing me. I felt pathetic but I wanted her mouth on me more than I cared about that. And I cared about that a lot. I think she knew that.

I held back my scream by biting my lip as she lowered her head the last few inches and slipped her warm tongue through me. I drew blood quickly. My body shuddered and shook before her. Her hands kept me spread but I could have easily shut my legs if I wanted to. I didn't.

I was embarrassingly wet, I knew it before she did. She was barely touching me, her tongue only shallowly sliding through my folds. And yet when she finished licking me, after scraping across my twitching clit, I could see the wetness that she had gathered with her tongue. She looked at me as she let her tongue retreat into her mouth. Tasting me. And I knew it was over.

She had won.

She dipped her head again and I closed my eyes waiting... conceding defeat.

And then nothing.

"Tell me to stop" she said. It was so faint that I barely heard her. I can't trust my recall but it almost sounded like a question.

I didn't respond.

She bit my inner thigh.

"Alex, tell me to stop." More forceful this time.

Looking back, I wonder if she took pity on me and was selflessly attempting to return the control she had usurped. Then again, it could have just been another tactic to humiliate me, to give me the rope to hang myself. Either way.

"I can't" I breathed.

As soon as I responded, her tongue returned to my slit and dragged through me, this time with more pressure and purpose. I could feel all of her tongue, on every part of my dripping pussy. She lapped at my clit as I grew even wetter.

And it was incredible.

I wanted to pull her head into me closer but somehow I restrained myself. I let out small moans of pleasure instead of the screams that were building inside of me and considered that a coup.

Her tongue was everything and everywhere. When she pulled my clit into her mouth and sucked gently, I knew I wouldn't last much longer. She released me only to lick firmly against my swollen bundle.

The orgasm I had been controlling up to this point broke free and I braced for it as she started to suckle my clit, pulling it deeper and deeper into her mouth. When she flicked her tongue against me, I knew it was over. My body froze and I came down hard, shattering from the inside out.

I thought I heard her groan but my hearing was muddled by the white noise exploding in my head.

I lifted my hips slightly off the desk and pushed into her as I came all over her mouth. For her part, she stayed with me, licking clean the mess she had created.

After a few moments, she still hadn't stopped. It was half painful but I let her do it, not wanting her mouth to ever leave me and unsure what would happen when it did.

Then she abruptly pulled away. I had been proud of myself for holding upright during her assault, if that is even the right word for it, but now I regretted it as I had to see her.

Worst of all, I had to see her see me.

I didn't know what to say. I didn't even think anything could be said.

She took a deep breath and ran her fingers through her hair.

I couldn't read her for shit.

And then she was gone.


	2. Chapter 2

Days later and I'm still utterly confused.

Her true motives elude me but I have cobbled together a few possibilities for why this happened, for why she happened to me.

Maybe she did it to punish me, retribution for the way I was treating her. To show me how little power I actually have. Maybe she did it because she knew it was what I wanted all along. Maybe she wanted it herself.

Each scenario frightens and excites me more than the next.

The only thing I know with any degree of confidence is that I want her again. When I close my eyes, it is all I see. Her mouth - licking me, tasting me, making me come.

I don't know if I hate her more or less. Maybe I never hated her at all.

My game plan since it happened has consisted of subtle avoidance. If I don't see her, she won't know how humiliated and embarrassed she has made me.

The thing that shames me the most is how easily she figured it all out. All she had to do was give me head and I shut the fuck up.

I hate myself.

It is late as I sit on the small couch in my office reading through a brief. While all these thoughts undoubtedly flit about somewhere in the ether of my mind, I've actually been able to focus for the last few hours. Not an insignificant achievement.

A timid knock on the door. So soft I don't answer right away, not sure I actually heard it at all.

Then again.

"Come in" I say.

The door opens slowly, only a sliver, and she appears. Since the couch sits next the door, we're quite close already. Our eyes meet and for a moment I think I can see something in her face, some evidence of something, but it passes quickly.

"Hi" she says.

I still can't read her.

"Hi" I return casually. I'm skeptical.

I'm about to ask her why she is here when she steps the rest of the way in and turns her body to the door as she pushes it closed, pressing her hand against the frame so it shuts quietly while the hand that has been gripping the knob slips down to the lock.

The click of the lock sets off a flood of wetness between my legs.

I shift in my sit, releasing the leg that has been folded beneath me. I let the brief fall to the side and try to prepare myself.

She walks around in front of me and slowly descends to her knees, her hands sliding up my legs.

As much as I have craved her touch, I feel the anger rise within me. Who the fuck does she think she is? Who the fuck does she think I am? Her arrogance infuriates me. She must find me so pathetic. It is true, I am, but I take umbrage with her knowing it.

I keep my knees together, offering her nothing, and glare at her through my glasses.

Either she doesn't care about my petulance or she doesn't notice it. She hasn't looked at me since she first entered. She pushes my skirt up towards my waist, as much as she can since I don't offer her any help. Her fingers on my skin leave a trail of fire.

In the same motion, she pulls my thong down and off. I don't stop her.

She looks up at me innocently as if she isn't to blame for this.

I want to slap her but now she pushes my knees apart and I feel the cool air hit me. I watch her eyes glaze over.

And then I'm pulled forward on the edge of the couch, spread before her, my pussy inches from her mouth. The scent of my arousal fills the air.

She pauses and the longer she waits, the wetter I become. I can feel my clit tighten and twitch and I know she can see it.

And then her mouth is on me. Long broad licks with the flat of her tongue through my slick folds. I hold back the moan in my throat but I can hear the sounds of my labored breathing. Over and over, she glides through me.

I want to fall back against the couch and close my eyes but I struggle to stay as I am, not wanting to give in. Not wanting to show her how much I'm enjoying this, how much I want it. It is silly, I know, fighting these small, meaningless battles when I've already lost the war.

Her tongue circles my opening and I know I'm panting.

I wonder if she'll fuck me this time.

She doesn't.

Instead, she gathers the moisture she has found and drags her tongue upward to scrape against my now throbbing, swollen clit. She flicks it hard and my hips jerk forward without my consent.

Her hands that have been resting on my inner thighs tighten their hold and her fingernails dig into my flesh.

I gasp.

I never want this to stop, I admit to myself.

Now she tongues my clit softly, almost painfully lightly as I try not to writhe before her to increase the contact.

She's teasing me.

Despite my best attempts to resist, my back straightens up and I arch into her. I show her how much I need her when my hand slips into soft shoulder-length auburn locks before gripping tightly and pulling her into me. She pauses for a second and I panic, thinking she might stop altogether.

Without warning, she sucks my clit between her lips and I moan loudly. It is startling in the quiet office. I feel her sigh against me and then lick me with renewed fervor.

It isn't fair. She kneels before me as if in supplication but I'm the one begging.

Strong, firm licks against my clit as I twitch and cry out freely, not caring for the moment how I sound to her. I can feel my wetness dripping down, coating her chin.

I'm whimpering.

I think about asking her to fuck me.

Before I can, she flicks hard against my clit and sucks me into her mouth. I can feel the pressure start low in my belly and radiate outwards. I'm screaming out my orgasm, pushing myself into her mouth.

And for a few moments, it is perfect.

But as I start to come down, I feel the embers of my shame.

To add insult to injury, she continues to lick me. She takes her time, lapping up the juices that have collected around my spasming, neglected opening. Then long, luxurious strokes up and down my slit as I continue to shake and tremble before her. My body is not my own. It is completely hers.

I'm mesmerized watching her clean my pussy with her tongue, my hand still in her hair but powerless to direct anything, just along for the ride.

Before I know what is happening, I'm coming again, hard and fast. I almost didn't even feel it sneak up on me before it was there. Nanoseconds before I crash into oblivion, I hear her groan. Finally, some indication she is enjoying this.

My head is thrown back and I try to focus on my breathing. I take note of the ceiling's pattern but I'm having a hard time keeping my eyes open.

She still hasn't stopped.

My head falls forward and I look down at her. I think she senses it because she slows her strokes until she deserts me altogether. I release my hand from her hair.

She pulls down my skirt almost tenderly. It feels like pity which incenses me. I want to tell her to leave but I can't.

She uses my legs as leverage to pull herself up. For one brief moment our eyes meet and I think she might kiss me. My heart pounds in my ears.

She doesn't.

A second later, she is gone.


	3. Chapter 3

It has happened several more times. And it is the same thing each time. It is like I'm on a loop.

They say insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result...

Now I've managed to avoid her for a week. I wish I could figure out a way to put her in her place but when I want that place to be between my legs, it is a winless prospect.

I'm sitting with an affidavit on my desk that needs her signature. I've procrastinated the entire day which was stupid because I need it ready to go first thing tomorrow. This is all so ridiculous.

Fuck.

I can't avoid her any longer.

I call her cell.

"Benson" she says. Unnecessary, she knows it is me.

"Hi, it's Alex" I say. Before she can respond to my equally inane opener, I push forward. "Listen, I need your signature on the Aurora affidavit by early tomorrow. Can I stop by the precinct on my way out?"

"I'm actually home already. Had to take care of a few things and it was a slow day."

"Ok" I say, drawing out the syllable as I try to figure out what I'm supposed to do with that. I'm about to suggest I find her early tomorrow when she speaks again.

"Stop by my apartment, it is on your way" she says. Her tone reveals nothing to me.

Before I can really think it through…

"Fine, see you soon." I hang up.

I panic momentarily. This whole thing is becoming unsustainable and annoying. I can't believe I've let it affect my work. I'm better than this.

I resolve to go to her apartment with the same disposition I bring to the courtroom – aloof, self-possessed, unyielding. I'll barely look at her.

* * *

I knock and step back, not wanting to be too close when she opens the door. I curse my beating heart.

I hear the top chain being pulled and she swings the door open. She smiles at me and I immediately want to punch her.

"Hey, come on in" she says, leaving the door open for me and walking to her kitchen counter.

I take one and a half steps inside. I want to leave the door open, hoping she'll get the hint to back off. But it seems too silly and I close it behind me, although I'm still within an arm's reach.

She grabs a pen off the table and approaches me again. I open the folder and hand her the document. She stares at me curiously for a second before flipping through the papers and then leaning against the wall to my right to sign.

"Here you go" she says, still unreadable.

"Thank you" I say and turn to leave. I've just grabbed the door knob when she is on me, her body pushing me into the door. I can feel her breath against my ear and neck.

She takes the folder out of my hand and tosses it to the floor.

Her hands reach around my waist and I gasp, audibly.

"Why do you try so hard to fight this?" she whispers next to my ear.

I don't answer her.

She pulls my shirt out from my skirt and caresses my bare stomach. I know I tremble beneath her fingers.

"I know how much you want it" she says, taunting me. I can feel her smugness even though I can't see it on her face.

"Go fuck yourself" I seethe. A sad effort, I know.

"I'd rather fuck you" she replies glibly.

Her hands inch up to my breasts and I hold my breath.

"Do you want to know how I know you want it?" she asks as her hands cover my breasts, squeezing gently. I can hear her breathing increase. I dig the palms of my hands into the door.

She bites behind my ear.

A moan escapes my lips and I hope she hasn't noticed.

She attempts to lift my shirt up over my head and I think about resisting. But I don't. I resume my position against the door.

She deserts me for a second and in my peripheral vision I see her shirt fall to the floor. She presses against my back again and I can feel hardened nipples through her bra.

Another bite behind my ear as her hands find my breasts again.

"I know... by how dripping wet you are, even before I touch you."

One of her hands slides down to my thigh. I'm shaking. Her other hand deserts my breast and unzips my skirt. She encourages it down until it crumples around my feet.

"I know by how you open yourself to me, giving my tongue access to all of you."

Her hand caresses my ass as she kneels behind me and pulls my panties down to meet my skirt. I step out of both, not needing any direction from her.

My forehead thuds against the door as her hands travel up my legs.

"Fuck" I breathe out.

My eyes squeeze shut and I bite my lip into my mouth. She gets up, pressing into me again, her right hand still against my left inner thigh. I feel her breath on me as she continues.

"I know by how your clit throbs when I suck it between my lips."

Her hand has moved up, so close to touching me where I need to be touched. But she doesn't close the distance. With her free hand, she unclasps my bra and I let it fall down my arms to the floor.

She pulls my earlobe into her mouth and her hand cups my naked breast.

I moan loudly. Wetness is dripping down my thighs and I wonder if she can feel it.

"I know... by how you hard you come all over my mouth."

"Please" I whisper, knowing I'm finished. Knowing I need her hand on me and I'll do anything to make it happen.

"And I know by how you let me lick your pussy clean when I'm done."

I cry out, unable to take this torture anymore.

No sooner do I accept that I'm going to let her fuck me from behind than she gently turns me around to her. I can barely see her, the edges of my vision are clouded over.

Swiftly, she pulls my legs around her waist, lifting me up and pressing me against the door. I wrap my arms around her neck.

"Alex" she breathes, her eyes holding mine. Her hand settles between my legs.

"Please fuck me" I relinquish. I can barely keep my head up.

Her eyes search mine for a moment and before I know it, she is kissing me. For the first time. No sooner can I register the softness of her lips, the gentleness of her tongue before she slides two fingers deep inside me.

I moan into her mouth, not wanting to stop kissing her. She slowly withdraws her fingers halfway before pushing into me again.

I tear my mouth away from hers for air and let the back of my head rest against the door. Her lips find the skin just above my clavicle and she bites down as she thrusts into me again.

I moan loudly.

I tighten my right leg around her waist and open myself more with my left, needing her as deep as possible.

I can hear the sound of her fingers thrusting into me. I know I've provided more than the necessary lubricant.

She's panting against my chest.

"Harder" I breathe out.

I hear her groan.

And then she slams into me hard, aided by her hip.

"Fuck, yes" I cry out. I don't even realize I'm forming words but each sound seems to make her fuck me harder.

At the same time as she adds a third finger, her thumb comes up to find my pulsating clit and she rubs against me.

I scream.

My body starts to tingle - my chest, my legs, inside me. I squeeze my eyes shut and cry out as I come all over her hand. I can't breathe, every bit of energy I have seems to be focused on contracting quickly against her fingers.

She slows down, coaxing me through multiple aftershocks, her thumb still against my clit, soothing me. I fall forward against her.

Only after I relax my arms do I realize my nails have been digging into the flesh of her back.

I brace myself for her to put me down, hoping I'll be able to stand.

Instead she removes her fingers slowly and adjusts my body higher around her waist. I almost don't realize we're moving until I open my eyes a sliver and see that we are in her bedroom.

She deposits me gently on top of her bed before she joins me, pulling my body into hers.

She caresses my back and moves a few strands of hair away from my face.

I'm too drowsy to think.

I tell myself to stay awake but my eyes close anyway.


End file.
